RUCHIRA ADIDAMA SUKHA DHAM:

Bhagavan Love-Ananda, Supreme and Divine Person, Real-God-Body of Love, I rest in Your Constant and Perfect Love-Embrace with no need but to forever worship you. Suddenly in love, Mastered at heart, always with my head at Your Supreme and Holy Feet, I am beholding and recognizing Your Divine Body and "Bright" Divine Person. My Beloved, You so "Brightly" Descend and utterly Convert this heart, mind, body, and breath, from separate self to the "Bhava" of Your Love-Bliss-Happiness.

Supreme Lord Ruchira, in the profound depths of Ruchira Sannyas (since my Initiation into formal Ruchira Sannyas on December 18, 1994), the abandonment of the former personality, the relinquishment of ego-bondage to the world, and the profound purification and release brought about by my now almost twenty-four years of love and worship of You has culminated in a great comprehensive force in my one-pointed devotion to You and a great certainty in the Inherent Sufficiency of Realization Itself. The essence, or depth, of my practice is to always remain freely submitted and centralized in You, the Feeling of Being, the Condition Prior to all bondage, all modification, and all illusion.

My Beloved Lord Ruchira, You have Moved this heart-feeling and awareness to renounce all "bonding" with conditionally manifested others, conditionally manifested worlds, and conditionally manifested self, to enter into the depths of this "in-love" and utter devotion to You. I renounce all in order to Realize You and to exist eternally in Your House. Finding You has led to the revelation of a deep urge to abandon all superficiality and to simply luxuriate in Your Divine Body and Person. All separation is shattered in Your Divine Love-Bliss-"Bhava". Your Divine and Supreme Body Surrounds and Pervades all. Your Infusion is Utter. I feel You everywhere.

I am Drawn by Grace of Your Spiritual (and Always Blessing) Presence into profound meditative Contemplation of Your Very (and Inherently Perfect) State. Sometimes, when I am entering into these deep states of meditation, I remain vaguely aware of the body, and particularly of the breath and the heartbeat. I feel the heart and lungs slow down and become very loud-sounding. Then I am sometimes aware of my breath and heartbeat ceasing temporarily, or being suspended in a state of Yogic sublimity, and I quickly lose bodily consciousness. Then there is no body, no mind, no perceptual awareness, and no conceptual awareness. There is only abiding in Contemplation of You in Your Domain of Consciousness Itself. I feel You literally Are me, and, when I resume association with the body and begin once again to hear my breath and heartbeat, I feel the remarkable Power of Your Great Samadhi. I feel no necessity for anything, and I feel Your Capability to Bless and Change and Meditate all, in Your Place. I can feel how this entrance into objectless worship of You As Consciousness Itself (allowing this Abiding to deepen ever so profoundly, by utter submission of separate self to You) establishes me in a different relationship to everything that arises.

My Beloved Bhagavan, Love-Ananda, I have Found You. Now I can behold You and live in this constant Embrace. This is my Joy and Happiness and the Yoga of ego-renunciation I engage.

[October 11, 1997]

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